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“it is my right to know what’s happening with my mother.”
this from a friend whose 80-something mom landed in a toronto hospital after what would normally have been a no-big-deal urinary tract infection led doctors to a much bigger and more serious diagnosis of a rare life-threatening disease.
she had been there for days, first in a bed in the emergency room where she was receiving round-the-clock care, and then, after being admitted as a patient, in a semi-private room with an older man who never seemed to be awake.
at first, it was easy to forgive the fact that she had not been seen by a doctor days after leaving the er. after all, with an almost-certain diagnosis in the works, medications started and tests lined up, it was comforting that she was finally getting the care she needed and slowly climbing out of critical territory. plus, just one look around — patients in beds lining the hallway, medical staff rushing from room to room, an inability to find a wheelchair — it was clear that the circle of care was barely functioning. it was a system that could only be reactive, and only just. having a heart attack in the hallway? you get a bed. but if you’re ok to lie there for a bit longer, well, you’re going to lie there for awhile longer.
excluding him from his mother’s care was a violation of her rights
balancing caring for his kids and dog, and a full-time job, my friend visited every day. when he wasn’t there, he was texting and calling his mom, taking notes as she regaled him with stories of the nurses, doctors, and physiotherapists she had seen that day. she talked about the nice nurse who changed her iv bag, how she was wheeled away for tests only to lie on a bed in the hallway for hours, and the new medications that had been added to her daily routine. but no matter what time he visited — as next of kin and a designated support person — he was unable to connect with anyone who could explain the details of his mother’s care. this, despite the fact that the hospital claimed to consider patients and family members to be the “most important” member of the health-care team.