confirmation of his diagnosis from the neurologist also came with the news that jeremy will have a tough time living past the age of five.
“we went from shock to heartbroken and scared,” he says. they were a close-knit family and felt the big challenge was telling their parents.
as tara recalls, “i remember feeling panicked, but then deciding, ‘okay, we’re going to keep it together. we’re not going to make that big of a deal. we’re going to accept it and do all that we can.”
as caregivers and parents, darren and tara bray, back left and right, were never shy about speaking up. they helped get an educational assistant for jeremy, middle, at school and an elevator installed for his wheelchair.
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so they did, making some significant lifestyle changes that would support jeremy’s needs. darren works for manitoba hydro and tara is a registered nurse, so both had solid careers and health coverage. they were living in brandon but decided to move a half-hour drive away to their hometown of rivers, a community of just 1,200 people, where everyone knows each other, and the schools are small. “we felt that this was a better environment to bring jeremy up in and we knew we were going to build a new house that was totally accessible for him and wheelchair-friendly,” darren adds.
they also had a tremendous support system of family and friends in the area, which they both recognize makes a difference, whether they’re knowledgeable about sma or not. “you really need your family or friends or people that can help support you in this whole process,” he notes. “we’ve had occupational therapists and physiotherapists and resources like respite and things like that, you need all of that. people really need to research that kind of thing. you need all the support you can get.”
darren also knows the value and power of self-advocating to make things better. he took the initiative to help his family and others managing a diagnosis of sma in canada by exploring and learning as much as he could about the disease. he drove to the annual sma conference in denver through the u.s. non-profit cure sma where he met other families and saw other kids with the type 2 diagnosis that were much older than jeremy and were doing fine.